Nulledge.net

Without hesitation the future caught up with us. We closed our eyes for too long and now our realities are different. I’m still trying to keep the cigarette burning to light your way back… and keep the coffee warm in anticipation of your return.. but it’s getting harder. I’m a satellite now and i can feel myself pulling away…

Some of us became so different.. some of us still stayed the same… I said i would go… but I ended up staying.. and in some ways.. i’m paying the price for my choice.. and now… it seems.. all i have are memories… where once you stood lie vacant possibilities… dead end dreams and faded destinies…

I’m not myself these days… sometimes i think we forget how our actions have long lasting consequences… and some things.. their impact never lessens.. I find i abandoned too many in the pursuit of other things.. and there’s silence where once there was a multitude.. to those I let slip pass my grasp.. i’m sorry I didn’t try hard enough.. to those my actions caused you to leave.. I understand.. and someday.. when all is said and done.. I hope i’ll find you again.. and to those i had to leave… i offer no explanation… you should already know the reason why..

and with the light fading.. and the coffee getting cold.. i think we’re ready to face the future.. and let our past move gracefully out of the picture… put behind those things we clung onto as a piece of our younger years and embrace adult hood.. find love.. get married.. have children.. star careers.. live an unexpected life.. someday i’ll be ready to stop wishing you were still here.. but I’ll never forget your face.. and if one day.. we’re ready for that cup of coffee.. i’ll make a fresh batch.. and we can drown ourselves once again with nostalgia..